Motivation

I need a motivation to get things done. I make deals with myself all the time. If I clean the livingroom I reward myself with mindless television or a number puzzle. I don't like hard work and "the satisfaction of a job well done" doesn't quite inspire me.

I am obese. I currently weigh 265 lbs (fully clothed)which would be fine if I was 7 feet tall, but as I am only 5 feet 4 and one half inches, I am obese. I have always been big. When I was three years old I was wider than I was tall. I have food issues from childhood and genetics that make storing fat way easier than shedding it.

At my biggest I was 305 lbs. I lost 110 lbs over a period of six years. Then life got overwhelmingly stressful and I stopped caring about myself. I ate what tasted good and over a peroid of one year gained 75 lbs. back. The crisis that caused the stress became managable again and I asked myself what I was doing. I started to care again, but I think it really sucks that it takes so long to take the weight off and it is so easy to put it back on.

I want to loose weight, but am lacking the motivation I had. I lost weight in the past by eating healthy and adding activity to my life. I am still active. I just have to get the eating thing under control again. I had this idea to motivate me. What do I want more than chocolate? My last Netflix and the upcoming Tony Awards gave me an idea. I would like to see a Broadway show, on Broadway.

I am making myself a deal. My ideal weight for my body type is around 155 lbs, but to make the numbers rounder I am setting a weight loss goal of 100 lbs. When I get down to 165, no mater how long it takes, I am going to go to New York to see a show. I would love to have family or friends join me in setting a weight loss goal and then think about joining me on the journey.

I know that being accountable to myself should be enough, but it is not. I don't need public humiliation, but thrive with encouragement. I figure if I announce my goals it makes them real. I am now accountable to you and that is a motivation in and of itself.